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Cultivating Life Champions

By Amelia Fisher | Published on  
Rethink triumph in the human era, beyond mere victories.

In today’s society, we often equate winning with success. We celebrate the champions, the ones who come out on top, whether it’s in sports, politics, or business. But what if I told you that winning does not always lead to true success? Let me share with you a story that has deeply influenced my perspective on this matter.

As a former head coach of the UCLA Women’s Gymnastics Team, I had the privilege of leading the team for 29 years. Throughout my tenure, we achieved remarkable victories, securing seven National Championships and numerous accolades. It was an exhilarating journey, and I can’t deny that winning was incredibly enjoyable. However, what I realized along the way is that winning alone does not guarantee genuine success.

Our society has fostered a win-at-all-cost culture that permeates our schools, businesses, and even politics. We idolize those who reach the pinnacle, applauding their championship titles and achievements. But here’s the sad truth: many of these individuals leave their pursuits damaged, both mentally and emotionally. Students with straight A’s may graduate feeling broken. Athletes adorned with medals may bear the scars of their competitive journey, not just physically, but deep within their souls. Employees who bring in enormous profits may leave their companies with lasting wounds.

We have become so fixated on the end result, on crossing that finish line first, that we often overlook the human element and the damage caused along the way. This realization led me to call for a timeout—a pause to reflect and redefine what success truly means.

Real success, in my view, lies in the development of champions in life, irrespective of wins or losses. It’s about caring individuals who can thrive in the world, equipped with the tools and values to make a positive impact. Success should extend beyond team accomplishments, business triumphs, or even holiday bragging rights.

But how do we achieve this? It’s important to understand that while you may be able to force a win through dictation, you cannot dictate your way to success. Allow me to take you back to 1990 when I assumed the role of head coach for the UCLA Women’s Gymnastics Team, despite having no background in gymnastics. Coming from the world of ballet, I lacked expertise in developing a team culture. My initial approach was tough and relentless, mimicking the coaching styles of previous winners.

However, my first few seasons were far from successful. The turning point came when our team requested a meeting, where they candidly shared how my arrogance had hurt and belittled them. It was a wakeup call, and I realized that I needed to change my approach. Being a dogmatic dictator might yield compliant soldiers, but it does not create champions in life. Motivating someone to become better requires more than just giving orders—it demands patience, empathy, and the willingness to invest time in their personal growth.

My focus shifted from a singular pursuit of victory to developing a coaching philosophy centered around growing champions in life through the medium of sport. I understood that if I could fortify our student-athletes as whole individuals, success on the competition floor would naturally follow.

One of the remarkable stories that shows this transformation is that of Katelyn Ohashi. When she joined our team, she was physically, mentally, and emotionally shattered. The weight of high-level athletics had taken its toll, and she had lost her joy in the process. It became evident that Katelyn did not want to be a winner anymore because the price of winning had robbed her of her happiness.

My challenge was to motivate her to redefine success and find joy in gymnastics again. It was not an easy journey, but by focusing on her well-being as a whole person, not just an athlete, we witnessed a remarkable transformation. We encouraged her to explore her passions outside of gymnastics, providing a safe space where she could rediscover her self-worth and self-love. And slowly but surely, her joy returned, propelling her to become an NCAA floor champion and contributing to our team’s seventh NCAA championship victory.

Let’s take a moment to reflect on the people in our own lives, those we have the privilege of guiding and caring. Whether they are our children, students, or teammates, the way we approach their development matters. Instead of fixating solely on the end result, let’s engage with them on a deeper level. Ask questions about their experiences and the lessons they’ve learned, rather than just focusing on wins, scores, or grades. By truly listening and providing a safe space for open communication, we can help them grow into champions in life.

As parents, coaches, and leaders, it’s our collective responsibility to redefine success and prioritize the well-being of those under our care. We must lead with empathy, integrity, and a genuine commitment to their growth. Only then can we foster a culture that produces champions in every aspect of life without compromising their well-being.

So, let’s remember that winning does not always equal success. It’s time to shift our focus and develop a new definition of what it means to be truly successful—one that encompasses personal growth, toughness, and the ability to positively impact the world around us. In this new paradigm, success becomes a win-win situation for everyone involved.

Success—it’s a concept we all strive for, but have we stopped to consider what true success really means? Let me share with you a powerful perspective that has reshaped my understanding of success based on the experiences and insights of a remarkable individual.

Picture this: a retired head coach of the UCLA Women’s Gymnastics Team, who led the team for an impressive 29 years. Throughout her tenure, she achieved remarkable victories, winning seven National Championships and earning esteemed recognitions. But what she realized along the way is that winning alone does not define success.

In today’s society, we tend to equate success with winning—the championships, the accolades, the triumphs. But this extraordinary coach recognized that there is a deeper, more profound meaning to success. She noticed a crisis in the win-at-all-cost culture that has seeped into our schools, businesses, and even politics. Winning, it seems, has become the sole measure of accomplishment, overshadowing the human aspect of the journey.

As a society, we often idolize those at the top, applauding their victories and celebrating their achievements. But what goes unnoticed is the toll that this relentless pursuit of victory takes on individuals. Students may leave schools with straight A’s but bear the weight of emotional damage. Athletes decorated with awards and medals may walk away from their teams not only physically worn but mentally and emotionally scarred. Employees who generate substantial profits may exit their workplaces with deep-seated wounds.

It was in recognizing this damaging cycle that the coach made a bold call for a time-out—a collective pause to redefine success. She advocated for a shift in our perspective, urging us to focus on developing champions in life, regardless of whether they win or lose.

But how do we go about achieving this paradigm shift? The coach shared her personal journey of transformation, recounting her early days as a head coach when she relied on a tough-talking, relentless, and dictatorial coaching style. She aimed solely for victory, not realizing the negative impact it had on her team.

However, her wake-up call came when the team confronted her, expressing how her approach hurt and demeaned them. It was a pivotal moment—a realization that true success cannot be achieved by force and dictation alone. She understood that motivating individuals to be their best selves requires patience, empathy, and a commitment to their holistic growth.

The coach embarked on a profound transformation, shifting her focus from the singular pursuit of victory to developing a coaching philosophy centered around caring champions in life through the medium of sport. She recognized that by fortifying her student-athletes as whole human beings, success on the competition floor would naturally follow.

One of the remarkable stories she shared was that of Katelyn Ohashi, an immensely talented gymnast who came to UCLA broken in body, mind, and spirit. Katelyn had grown up in an intense athletic environment, and the pursuit of greatness had robbed her of her joy. It was through a patient, empathetic approach that the coach helped Katelyn redefine success and rediscover her love for gymnastics. The transformation was awe-inspiring, leading to Katelyn becoming an NCAA floor champion and contributing to the team’s championship victory.

The coach’s message touches beyond the realm of sports. It applies to all aspects of life where we have the privilege to guide and care others. Whether we are parents, coaches, or leaders, we must reevaluate our definition of success and shift our focus to the development of champions in life.

Instead of fixating solely on end results, let’s engage in meaningful conversations with those under our care. Let’s ask questions about their experiences, lessons learned, and personal growth. By truly listening and providing a safe space for open communication, we can create an environment where individuals can flourish.

In conclusion, success goes far beyond mere victory. It lies in the cultivation of toughness, personal growth, and the ability to positively impact the world around us. Let’s join the coach in her call to redefine success and create a win-win scenario, where achievement is measured not just by trophies and titles, but by the development of exceptional human beings.

In today’s society, there is an alarming crisis that often goes unnoticed—a crisis rooted in our collective obsession with winning at all costs. It permeates our schools, businesses, and even the world of politics. We live in a culture that celebrates the victors, the champions, and the ones who come out on top. But have we stopped to consider the detrimental effects of this win-at-all-cost mentality?

Reflecting on the insights shared by a renowned coach, it becomes evident that our fixation on winning has dire consequences. We shower praise and adulation on those who win championships, elections, and awards, often without considering the toll it takes on their well-being. The sad reality is that many of these individuals leave their respective domains as damaged human beings.

Think about it: straight-A students who graduate feeling broken, athletes who bear the emotional and mental scars alongside their medals, and employees who walk away from lucrative positions with a sense of damage. We have become so fixated on the end result, on reaching that finish line first, that we disregard the human element—the toll it takes on the individuals who strive for victory.

As a society, we need to recognize the damage caused by this win-at-all-cost culture. We must acknowledge that success should not be measured solely by the number of trophies on the shelf or the bottom line of a balance sheet. True success extends beyond these external markers. It lies in the development of whole human beings—individuals who can thrive not just in their chosen field but in life as a whole.

The coach’s call for a time-out is a powerful reminder that we need to redefine success. We need to shift our focus from the end result to the process and the journey. It’s about developing champions in life, irrespective of the outcome. Success should not be confined to a team, a business, or even personal bragging rights. It should be about caring individuals who embody qualities of toughness, empathy, and a positive impact on the world.

It’s time to pause and reflect on the damaging effects of our current culture. We must acknowledge that dictating and forcing a win does not breed success—it leaves behind a trail of brokenness. Instead, we need to adopt a new approach, one that focuses on motivating individuals to be better, to grow, and to thrive. It’s about growing an environment where the human spirit is not sacrificed for the sake of victory.

The road to redefining success may be challenging, but it’s a journey worth embarking on. It requires us to prioritize the well-being and development of those under our care—whether they are students, athletes, or employees. We need to create spaces that foster growth, empathy, and personal fulfillment. By doing so, we can transform our win-at-all-cost culture into one that values the journey, celebrates the process, and produces not just winners, but champions in life.

Let us heed the coach’s call for change and recognize that true success is not confined to the podium or the record books. It lies in the transformation of individuals into well-rounded, resilient, and fulfilled human beings. Together, we can reshape our culture, redefine success, and build a future where winning and personal growth go hand in hand.

Have you ever stopped to think about what success truly means? In a world that often prioritizes winning and external achievements, it’s essential to take a step back and reevaluate our definition of success. Let me share with you an inspiring story that highlights the importance of focusing on the human component in our pursuit of success.

Imagine being appointed as the head coach of the UCLA Women’s Gymnastics Team, despite having no prior experience in gymnastics. This was the reality for a remarkable coach who grew up in the world of ballet. Initially, her coaching style revolved around toughness, relentless determination, and a single-minded focus on winning. But she soon discovered that this approach led to abysmal results and left her team feeling hurt and demeaned.

In a pivotal team meeting, the coach received honest feedback from her athletes. They expressed their desire for support, motivation, and a coaching style that built them up rather than tearing them down. This profound realization became her “time-out” moment—a turning point that prompted her to reassess her coaching philosophy.

She recognized that success should not be solely defined by winning championships. It was about developing champions in life, individuals who could thrive not just in their sport but also as well-rounded human beings. To achieve this, she had to shift her focus from dictation to motivation. Rather than simply giving orders, she needed to take the time to understand her athletes, support their personal growth, and foster a culture of respect and accountability.

The coach’s transformation was not an overnight process. She realized that true motivation takes time to grow. It required building trust, fortifying her athletes as whole individuals, and emphasizing their well-being beyond the competitive arena. This approach allowed her athletes to rediscover their joy and passion for their sport while developing essential life skills.

One of the inspiring examples she shared was the story of Katelyn Ohashi. When Katelyn joined the team, she was broken—physically, mentally, and emotionally. Her previous athletic experiences had stripped away her love for gymnastics. But through the coach’s patient guidance, Katelyn gradually found her self-worth and rekindled her passion.

The coach’s coaching philosophy extended beyond the gym. She encouraged her athletes to explore their interests outside of their sport, to find joy in other areas of life, and to hug personal growth. By caring their overall well-being, she witnessed a profound transformation in her athletes. Katelyn, for instance, not only regained her love for gymnastics but also went on to become an NCAA floor champion and contributed to the team’s victory.

This powerful story serves as a reminder to all of us. Whether we are parents, coaches, or leaders in any capacity, we have a responsibility to redefine success. It is not solely about the end result, but about the journey, the growth, and the development of the individuals under our guidance.

As parents, we can shift our focus from solely asking about grades or scores to engaging in conversations about our children’s experiences, learning, and personal growth. As coaches, we can create an environment that values the human spirit, that emphasizes empathy, and that helps our athletes become champions in life. And as leaders, we can redefine success in our businesses by fostering a culture that prioritizes the well-being of our employees, encouraging personal development alongside professional achievements.

So, let’s take a moment to reflect on how we define success in our own lives and in the lives of those we influence. Together, we can reshape our collective perspective and build a society where success is not measured solely by wins and titles, but by the positive impact we have on others and the growth we foster within ourselves.

In a world that often prioritizes winning and external achievements, it is crucial to redefine our understanding of success. The inspiring insights shared by a seasoned coach have shown us the importance of focusing on the human component in our pursuit of greatness.

We have learned that true success extends beyond mere victories and championships. It lies in the development of champions in life—individuals who thrive not only in their respective fields but also as well-rounded human beings. The damaging effects of a win-at-all-cost culture have become apparent, as we see the toll it takes on the mental, emotional, and physical well-being of individuals who strive for victory.

By shifting our perspective and prioritizing the growth, well-being, and personal fulfillment of those under our care, we can redefine success in profound ways. As parents, coaches, and leaders, we have the power to create environments that foster toughness, empathy, and positive impact. We can shift our focus from dictation to motivation, from solely seeking the end result to hugging the journey and the lessons learned along the way.

Let us remember that success is not confined to trophies or accolades. It is a transformative process that shapes individuals into exceptional human beings. By valuing personal growth, caring the human spirit, and celebrating the progress made, we can reshape our culture into one that produces not just winners, but champions in life.

As we move forward, let’s challenge ourselves to redefine success and extend our support beyond the pursuit of victory. Together, we can create a world where personal growth, empathy, and the well-being of individuals are at the forefront of our endeavors. Let us strive for a society that fosters holistic development, enabling individuals to reach their full potential and make a positive impact on the world around them.

In the journey of redefining success, we can unlock the true potential within ourselves and others. Let’s hug this transformative mindset and pave the way for a brighter, more compassionate future.